So it’s Father’s day today?! I’ve always tried as much as possible to avoid talking about my dad simply because i really don’t have anything positive to say. And i don’t enjoy dwelling on negativity. Buh because of what today is i’ve decided to say a few things and get it over with. I might never talk about it again.
Last week, TNC (http://www.thenakedconvos.com) started a series on ”Sins of the Father”. At first i wasn’t interested you know,i try as much as possible to avoid any talk on fathers/daddies, i have enough to put up with as it is. But after constantly clogging my TL with links, i eventually succumbed and read a piece on Envy or so. Can’t remember now. After scanning through (Yeah wasn’t interested in reading verbatim), i realised i couldn’t relate with what the writer was trying to pass across. So i left. Sometime ago, King tweeted something about missing his dad and all. Again I didn’t know what to say to console him. *sigh
I do not have a relationship with my father despite the fact that we share the same birthday and our rooms are opposite each other. All those father-daughter bond talk is just bleh! I have no idea what it means. And i’m here asking myself whether or not it would affect me later on. I mean so far i’ve been able to cope with my mother doubling as both parents. I aven’t really had problems with guys so to speak and i’m doing pretty good. I guess God has just been helping me really. That’s the only explanation. He has a way of filling the void and emptiness i feel as well as surpressing the resentment. Buh then again,i still hope the absence of a father-figure isn’t gonna have adverse effects on the long-run. *shrugs* whatever.
I really don’t wanna talk too much. I mean what’s there to even talk about. There’s no point. It’s not like it’s gonna change things or my dad is gonna man up overnight. Everything’s still gonna be the same. Buh you know one thing i’m grateful for?! I don’t have a distorted view of men generally. I still believe there are good guys out there. I believe there are guys who aren’t sex-obsessed, who don’t have the mind to raise their hands on women,who fear God and will make amazing spouses and fathers. Always at the back of my mind is that verse that says all things work together for good to them that love God. I probably wouldn’t have turned out this way if my dad was all lovey-dovey. A spoilt brat maybe. I’m sure i wouldn’t have been driven to write and start this blog. LOL
So some of y’all that still have fathers that are alive and functioning, give him a call, say a word of prayer on his behalf or buy that coffee he loves so much because some of us will trade anything in the world for that opportunity.
Happy Father’s Day.