Yesterday was sunday.
Church was good.
Remember I said I was returning to my old church? Yeah I did. It’s been two months now and I can’t believe I’m actually saying this, but I’m bored already. I really do not look forward to returning there next week but I have to. I have to get baptized before June and for some reasons my mum insists that’s the most suitable place for me to take my classes. I have no idea why. I can’t argue and I have no choice[as long as I still live under her roof].
Yesterday wasn’t any different.
Woke up early
Get to church
Grab a seat…..at the top floor because people won’t stop asking why or how much you’ve grown. [Duhh! Do you expect me to remain 16 forever?]
Try to concentrate because I’m absent-minded half the time. The sermons have sort become cliche. It almost makes no sense
Classes start. The teachers can’t stop staring. They don’t understand why I have makeup on or why my hair that is almost covered is the way it is. I’m trying really hard to restrain myself from being tagged ”rude” and offer faux smiles.
[Remind me why I’m returned to this church again?]
My teacher spends the whole time explaining and explaining just one portion of the study when he clearly doesn’t have the time. Most of the time he ends up skimming through the rest urging us to finish up at home. [Yeah right]. Again, my mind wonders. Sunday school classes have done enough growing up. The sermons are cliche enough, why add this?
Classes end. 30/45 minutes seem like forever.
Find my way home before 12noon.
That’s how it’s been, for the past two months and I’m wondering; when did Church become such a chore?
One time, I told my mum I was gonna go church-hopping at least until I find a decent one with soul moving/inspiring worship and unconventional sermons [No, I’m not interested in prosperity messages]. You needed to see her reaction. She almost went bonkers. I let that rest. Didn’t bring it up again. I already have a mental note of some of the churches I want to try out.
Something particularly happened. I was told beforehand that I was gonna teach a topic. At first, I was taken aback for some reasons.
I WANT TO GO HOME FOR PETE’S SAKE!!!!.
Moving on, so yesterday, my teacher just announced that I was starting the class. Fortunately, I had done a little research and so it came in real handy. Then, I started talking. And went on talking, stuttering occasionally and I didn’t want to stop.
I was enjoying the sound of my own voice.
Is it me or is it weird? I think this is the first time it’s happening. Who does that? I could literally listen to myself speak all day. Like seriously. I don’t have to say anything meaningful, well if it is but if not, no worries. Then I took a stroll down memory lane and remembered my first love.
Yep! I had a conversation with a friend of mine back in the day and I remember his words very clearly, ”I can’t wait for you to get to CNN” Whatever made him think I was CNN material then, I never asked till today. A few weeks ago, I spoke to Ola, one of my longest phone calls in recent times. Same thing that happened. I couldn’t stop talking. He literally had to beg me to stop. [Gosh! What was he expecting? He went for a surgery without telling me. How was he expecting me to react?] Anyways, moving on. Ola passed his own comment and it struck a cord.
One of the reasons I was fascinated with Denrele Edun growing up was because of his eloquence. I used to watch Soundcity a lot then. Have you even sat down to listen to him speak especially on the red carpet blocking out his crazy fashion sense? Just listen to him pick his words and present them. I don’t know about now; couldn’t really be bothered. Maybe you could check YT for old videos.
For some reasons, I used to have this idea of having a talk show at the back of my mind and then over time the thought dwindled. Right now, it’s not even on my mind at all. Tables have sort of turned but undoubtedly it’s something I’ve always wanted to do. Everyone around me knew I was gonna go for it and were lowkey rooting for me. Now that I think of it, I feel like I’ve disappointed them. *shrugs*
I think someday, one day I’m gonna rekindle this dream again. I don’t know. It’s already on my bucket list so it’s valid so to speak.
Yes I[used to] love talking and I think when presented before an audience, I could kill it. It could be flawless and effortless. All that stuttering could be worked on. [I think I was nervous]. I think I have a pretty decent accent for someone bred here and might even get better when I move eventually. Yes! I think so.
Love, talk and more talk