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Carefree Black Girl.

 

There are two things I’ve recently discovered about myself;
1. I don’t know how to endlessly brood over things hence forgiveness comes easily to me.
2. I cherish my peace of mind.

When I was in high school, I had a friend – a buddy more or less. We did stuff together, got individual “special” admissions/graduated at the same time (as well as other coincidences), wrote SATs together and even became prefect partners eventually – at this point, I totally resented him. I can’t remember what caused the fight but we had a big one in junior school and I sent him to hell. I didn’t speak to him for 6 months. Turns out, I took the trip myself. I was miserable the whole time but my pride didn’t allow me confront him. I had totally forgiven and forgotten about the whole incident roughly a month later because that’s the normal thing to do. But I missed my friend terribly and I couldn’t bring myself to talk to him until a counsellor intervened. Oh yeah! That serious.

I do not know how to bottle things up for a long time. I don’t know how folks do it. A mean, my anger dissipates after a fairly long while (read two months max). After which the acknowledgment of various faults, rational thinking and eventual forgiveness. Overtime, I’ve realised that whatever the gravity of offence is, the pattern remains unerring. Sometimes, I wonder if it’s a weakness(of sorts). Trust me, being 5″0 is a magnet for vulnerability. Some people think they can take advantage of you just because you can’t stand up to them.

But the thing is I cherish my peace of mind. I don’t not have the luxury of keeping malice with people. I love living in the moment – not in the past or the future – yes, I hardly worry about the future. I love that blissful state of mind where grudges or stale offences don’t count.

I literally forgive and…..forget.

Plus, Jesus said we should forgive seventy times seven. Even at that, it’s easier for God to forgive my trespasses even as I forgive those who trespass against me.

It’s a win-win situation.

EB.

8 thoughts on “Carefree Black Girl.”

  1. Woaw. What a nice piece to read. I really enjoyed how down to earth it is.I truly admire your forgiving spirit. I just wanted to know how you manage to l Iive in d present like you mentioned. Some people like me find it easier to brood over the past.your comment would be highly appreciated.again nice piece.

  2. Wow am happy I came across your blog…I love reading too and its so lovely to see someone else that likes too…its mid feburary and I’ve read over 16 books. I love your january reads and you should truly read the 50 shades series and judge for yourself.I liked it.would be watching this space….rali

  3. I could rant or side-eye or complain, but I don’t get really angry easily. I don’t know how to hold a grudge. If I’m really mad at someone, I won’t be able to function. It eats me up. You’ll be there seething & the person is living their life. No point to it. Forgive & forget. 77 x 7 times.

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